A Secret About Women and Feminism


I predicted I would write at least one rant during my “post every day for a week” experiment and here it is.

I hate when people preface their obvious opinions with “this is only my opinion”, but … what follows is only my opinion.

Beginning of Rant

Secret #1:  Feminism is not about men or hating men.  Feminism is about empowering women. We have allowed ourselves to be disempowered in many ways when in reality we have a lot of power. Feminism is a movement in recognizing the natural power we have.  It’s a return to power.  Not power over anyone or anything.  If we care about and discuss amongst ourselves issues like beauty myths, sexism, and rape, it is to empower ourselves.  Not to blame men.

Feminism is about empowering women to do whatever they want.

This is how feminism looks like to me:  caring when other women suffer or are treated badly and unfairly.  Caring when women can’t do whatever they want.  Caring when women do what they want.

How is any of this threatening?

I am a feminist.  I’m not afraid to say I am.  I don’t know how any woman can claim not to be one if a feminism is defined the way I defined it above.  Many women do not subscribe to any definition of feminism.  I do not know of one other female that I have talked to face to face who adopts the label “feminist”.  I cannot recall in the last 20 years ever having a conversation with another woman where the word “feminism” was uttered.  The couple of times feminism has come up in the last 20 years, the conversations were started by men.

Here’s my question:  As a feminist, I never discuss, talk about, rant about or even mention feminism or hear it mentioned by other women.   So why does it seem like so many men are whining about it (mostly online)?  Why are they so angry about it and act so wounded by it?  Does feminism really affect them in any way?  I doubt it.  Are “feminazis” harming them?  I doubt it.  Yet there seems to be this contempt of feminism and blame of feminists for … what?  I have no idea.

How can feminism be a problem when most women don’t claim do be feminists?

It’s gross and infuriating when women deny the role feminism has played and continues to play in their lives.  It is gross and unattractive when men whine about feminism.  It’s weird.  Am I missing something?  Men whining about feminism is like a shark complaining that the sand on the beach is too hot.  That didn’t make sense?  Neither does men complaining about the evils of feminism.

If you’re a man and you’re reading this, I’m about to reveal something about women that will change your life.

Secret #2:  You know what women want?  Women want to do whatever they want, say whatever they want, feel whatever they want for as long as they want and they want to do all of this and feel safe.

Women want to be happy.

Women want freedom.

And to feel safe.

Women don’t and never will hate men.

You can rape us, hit us, kill us, ignore us, call us cunts, whores and psycho, lie to us, yell crude things when we’re walking down the street, tell us we’ll die alone if we cut our hair, or whine about feminism.

And we still won’t hate you.

We will always want your love.  Let us be women who love.

End of rant.


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